lost.icism

i have beautiful friends and a beautiful family and i'm starting to learn how to love myself, but then again, i can't seem to see through my doubt.

and then i realized, you have to find yourself before you fall for somebody else. who is going to appreciate a confused/pathetic/doubtful/insecure girl who tries to be like everyone in her life because On my own, I don't know who I am or who to be.

It's no wonder I have made the mistakes I have made, its no wonder I can't grasp on to a relationship, and there is the reason why I am so confused. Because, I don't have hope in myself, and I don't know why I want to be like everyone and gain everyone's approval and feel worth for all the wrong reasons.

Shit....I need to take a bath and think of all of this.