bitter fucking sweet

Happy, yet, I know on the inside
I am begging to run away from all of you
my lungs are expanding, and my heart is beating fast
I want to make it
Could I leave you here, standing?
Your not alone, your with everyone besides yourself
I will be okay, you would be fine with out me.
You have them, but you will never have yourself.
So, a bitter fucking sweet thought,
hoping soon to become a bitter fucking sweet goodbye,
things like this are impossible,
things like this are inevitable,
how do I spend all this time thinking of you?
Fond friends that create these few good memories,
I hope to leave you amidst your own selfish, premature, arrogant lives.
I am so much more, I live to be so much more, to do so much more.
I don't need you for anything, nothing
This plot never comes out successful.

I don't know why I feel like this, I don't know why you people have to act like this, I don't know why I hate you, but I do, even though we are 'so close'.

Sorry?
...
sort of.